Knitting a Conundrum

Abbe Zeno said, 'If a man wants God to hear his prayer quickly, then before he prays for anything else, even his own soul, when he stands and stretches out his hands towards God, he must pray with all his heart for his enemies. Through this action God will hear everything that he asks.'

Just as it is easy to love people who are far away and not real to us, it is very easy to pray for those enemies who are also not the enemies who taunt us day after day or cause us real grief and pain. The enemies in our daily life: relatives, co-workers, bosses, people who irritate us, people who have hurt us, these are the ones we truly need to pray for and forgive, and it is the hardest thing of all, perhaps, but essential to our growth.

If you are offering your gift at the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift. Matthew 5: 23-24 RSV

Holding these fires in our heart blocks our connect to God in serious ways. We are told in the Lord's prayer: Forgive us of our debts as we forgive our debtors. If we harbor an active hate towards our brother, we cannot be forgiven.

But hate, like love, is a decision we can override or choose. If we combat that darkness in our own hearts with acts of love, by choosing to pray, by choosing to act in a loving way, we can be reconciled, forgive, act with love. It is in the action more than the feeling this takes place.

St. Therese of Lisieux said: "True love grows by sacrifice and the more thoroughly the soul rejects natural satisfaction the stronger and more detached its tenderness becomes." She also says:

True Charity consists in bearing with all the defects of our neighbor, in not being surprised at his failings, and in being edified by his least virtues; Charity must not remain shut up in the depths of the heart, for no man lighteth a candle and putteth it under a bushel, but upon a candlestick, that it may shine to all that are in the house. (Cf. Matthew 5:15). It seems to me that this candle represents the Charity which ought to enlighten and make joyful, not only those who are dearest to me, but all who are in the house.

St. Therese of Lisieux - Story of A Soul, Chapter IX

Jesus also tells us to be merciful the way his Father is merciful to the selfish and ungrateful. A hard thing to do, but worth so much in the long run. Don't expect to be highly sucessful at doing this at once, and don't expect that your enemy will approve necessarily of the prayers and love you are ready to offer. But if we do it for Jesus, through Jesus' power, because he asks us to, we cannot help but to make a difference.

Labels: Forgiveness, Love

And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors (Matthew 6:12 RSV)

One of the images that Jesus uses regularly about the relation between sinner and one sinned against is debt. We see this clearly in several of his parables. Forgiveness of debt is a key concept. For instance:

One of the Pharisees asked him to eat with him, and he went into the Pharisee's house, and took his place at table. And behold, a woman of the city, who was a sinner, when she learned that he was at table in the Pharisee's house, brought an alabaster flask of ointment, and standing behind him at his feet, weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears, and wiped them with the hair of her head, and kissed his feet, and anointed them with the ointment.

Now when the Pharisee who had invited him saw it, he said to himself, "If this man were a prophet, he would have known who and what sort of woman this is who is touching him, for she is a sinner."

And Jesus answering said to him, "Simon, I have something to say to you."

And he answered, "What is it, Teacher?"

"A certain creditor had two debtors; one owed five hundred denarii, and the other fifty. When they could not pay, he forgave them both. Now which of them will love him more?"

Simon answered, "The one, I suppose, to whom he forgave more."

And he said to him, "You have judged rightly."

Then turning toward the woman he said to Simon, "Do you see this woman? I entered your house, you gave me no water for my feet, but she has wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. You gave me no kiss, but from the time I came in she has not ceased to kiss my feet. You did not anoint my head with oil, but she has anointed my feet with ointment.

"Therefore I tell you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven, for she loved much; but he who is forgiven little, loves little."

And he said to her, "Your sins are forgiven."

Then those who were at table with him began to say among themselves, "Who is this, who even forgives sins?"

And he said to the woman, "Your faith has saved you; go in peace." (Luke 7: 36-50 RSV)

But beyond that, he makes it clear that the idea of forgiving debt transcends our asking God for his forgiveness of our debts to him, but requires that we behave in like manner:

"Therefore the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his servants. When he began the reckoning, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents; and as he could not pay, his lord ordered him to be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had, and payment to be made.

"So the servant fell on his knees, imploring him, `Lord, have patience with me, and I will pay you everything.' And out of pity for him the lord of that servant released him and forgave him the debt.

"But that same servant, as he went out, came upon one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii; and seizing him by the throat he said, `Pay what you owe.'

"So his fellow servant fell down and besought him, `Have patience with me, and I will pay you.' He refused and went and put him in prison till he should pay the debt. When his fellow servants saw what had taken place, they were greatly distressed, and they went and reported to their lord all that had taken place.

Then his lord summoned him and said to him, `You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you besought me; and should not you have had mercy on your fellow servant, as I had mercy on you?' And in anger his lord delivered him to the jailers, till he should pay all his debt.

"So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart." Matthew 18:23-35 RSV

Thus, we are taught in the Lord's prayer, "Forgive us our debts as we have forgiven our debtors." Our forgiveness is predicated on our response in kind. Let us pray that we too will have hearts softened with love to be forgiven much, and that in return we find the ways to forgive those who injure us.

Labels: Forgiveness, Ways of Holiness