Tuesday, March 15, 2005
Someone asked me about the nature of suffering. She was having many problems and didn't really understand why it was so.
My reply about suffering is very Catholic: we link and share our suffering with Christ. If we can give it up to him, it's like prayer.
I can say this having been there...I have nearly constant chronic pain.
The problem is we live in a world that is imperfect.
God lets things happen - a lot of it just happens that we want to blame on God (although he may be using some of this for his own means, I suspect that a lot of it is because this is the way the universe is set up).
We can let what happens draw us closer to him, or we can get bitter and angry. We can use our pain, grief and sadness as a channel that makes us focus on the really important, or we can say "Life's a b@@ch and then you die."
I think about the passion a lot, and about what Mary went through...all the snickers and whispers when she was having Jesus, the stress of having to run away so as not to be killed by Herod, living poor and losing Joseph, the stress of Jesus' ministry, watching him die.
God gave us some clear examples: Mary with her "do whatever he tells you to do," St. Paul with his thorn in the flesh and the beatings and torments he had, Peter who felt so horrid at having denied Jesus, yet who in the end let himself be crucified upside down because he didn't feel worthy to be crucified in the same way, and so many other examples, but most of all what Jesus, God on Earth, was willing to go through.
To be able to link ourselves to his offering by being part of the body of Christ gives me comfort. My suffering becomes a prayer, my place in the Passion, my role in Jesus' plan for the redemption.
Mother Teresa called it being kissed by Jesus wearing his crown of thorns.
This doesn't mean that there are times I don't whine and complain! I do! I am so tired of hurting like this every day. But once in Mass, I was sitting there, actually praying for healing, and it was like Jesus was saying, I give you two choices. I can heal you, or you can use this to help others. And in my heart, oh how I wanted to be healed! But I said, "You choose, Lord."
And God keeps sending me people to pray with and who I can offer up the pain and my prayers for.
This is my answer for it. Very catholic. I step out in faith and take him at his word. I believe he will take care of my needs, and even some of my wants, if they will be good for me. Over the years, and in different stages of my life, I have been touched by grief, anxiety, abuse, lost everything twice, but have been gifted with people who love me (especially my husband, but we've only been married six years, and I lived many years alone), and the knowledge of the love of God.
But here I am. Maybe I just like to make lemonade out of lemons, but this is how I cope with it all. And life is wonderful, sad, painful, amazing, frightening and overwhelmingly beautiful all at the same time, and I thank God for letting me experience it and occasionally touch another's life.
My reply about suffering is very Catholic: we link and share our suffering with Christ. If we can give it up to him, it's like prayer.
I can say this having been there...I have nearly constant chronic pain.
The problem is we live in a world that is imperfect.
God lets things happen - a lot of it just happens that we want to blame on God (although he may be using some of this for his own means, I suspect that a lot of it is because this is the way the universe is set up).
We can let what happens draw us closer to him, or we can get bitter and angry. We can use our pain, grief and sadness as a channel that makes us focus on the really important, or we can say "Life's a b@@ch and then you die."
I think about the passion a lot, and about what Mary went through...all the snickers and whispers when she was having Jesus, the stress of having to run away so as not to be killed by Herod, living poor and losing Joseph, the stress of Jesus' ministry, watching him die.
God gave us some clear examples: Mary with her "do whatever he tells you to do," St. Paul with his thorn in the flesh and the beatings and torments he had, Peter who felt so horrid at having denied Jesus, yet who in the end let himself be crucified upside down because he didn't feel worthy to be crucified in the same way, and so many other examples, but most of all what Jesus, God on Earth, was willing to go through.
To be able to link ourselves to his offering by being part of the body of Christ gives me comfort. My suffering becomes a prayer, my place in the Passion, my role in Jesus' plan for the redemption.
Mother Teresa called it being kissed by Jesus wearing his crown of thorns.
This doesn't mean that there are times I don't whine and complain! I do! I am so tired of hurting like this every day. But once in Mass, I was sitting there, actually praying for healing, and it was like Jesus was saying, I give you two choices. I can heal you, or you can use this to help others. And in my heart, oh how I wanted to be healed! But I said, "You choose, Lord."
And God keeps sending me people to pray with and who I can offer up the pain and my prayers for.
This is my answer for it. Very catholic. I step out in faith and take him at his word. I believe he will take care of my needs, and even some of my wants, if they will be good for me. Over the years, and in different stages of my life, I have been touched by grief, anxiety, abuse, lost everything twice, but have been gifted with people who love me (especially my husband, but we've only been married six years, and I lived many years alone), and the knowledge of the love of God.
But here I am. Maybe I just like to make lemonade out of lemons, but this is how I cope with it all. And life is wonderful, sad, painful, amazing, frightening and overwhelmingly beautiful all at the same time, and I thank God for letting me experience it and occasionally touch another's life.
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